Bumping Ugly

The Bumper Badger must die. Intended to protect your car’s bumpers from other car’s bumpers bumping into your’s while parking, this trend has reached a nadir amongst New York’s car-owning crowd. The Bumper Badger has become so popular, no one even bothers to tuck their flaps into their trunks after parking. It’s reminiscent of the hip-hop trend a few years back which had kids wearing their clothes with price tags still on to flaunt their wealth. Yet this is a trend born of irrational overprotection mixed with laziness rather than a statement of any kind. When I see a Mercedes Benz driving around with its flap a-flappin, it makes we wonder if the driver has his zipper down, driving back from a lobster dinner with his bib still tied on, to a house filled with furniture covered in plastic. Really… can a flimsy membrane of rubber even protect a car against an SUV’s metallic overbite? Are a few tiny dings really worse than everyone driving around with the automotive equivalent of toilet paper hanging out of the backs of their pants? The Bumper Badger is the worst designed product I’ve seen in years. If you have one, use it wisely, and when driving: keep that junk in your trunk.